It has been a tremendously long week for both the Beanie and for myself. When your baby looks to you as if you are a superhero who should be able to fix everything for her, and you can't, it's the most frustrating and hopeless feeling in the world. When she is sick or when she is hurt and there really is absolutely nothing you can do for her but promise it will get better - your self doubt, self loathing creeps in little bit by little bit. "Am I cut out for this?". "Maybe I'm not doing enough. What do I do?". "What if I'm not enough to do this?". In my heart of hearts, I know that I am the best mother for her mainly because I know there isn't anyone in this world who can love this girl more, but sometimes - .....
With that said, the weekend was a total kickoff to get me started on what is sure to be a long work week despite that July 4 is smack in the middle. Perhaps it's "Happy Mommy; Happy Baby", but that for sure works both ways.
No more sick baby!
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