Thursday, November 17, 2011

Ego vs Duty

I learned an important lesson this week. Doctors have a duty to address a patient's concern. Including complaints of children who are still non-verbal and the only thing you have to go on is an "ouch" that can mean a gazillion things. I took her to the ER on Saturday because it was a weekend and was so certain she had an ear infection. Oh no? Okay. We get sent home with Motrin at something like 6pm and most likely an eye roll from the attending resident and her pediatrician. 11pm rolls around and her fever spikes. Monday afternoon comes, she still has a fever and pediatrician sends me home with Motrin and Tylenol because you know, I couldn't pick it up from a drugstore myself. All my concerns are that of a first time, over zealous mom during flu season. Monday rolls into Wednesday. Her fever is not going away. I insist something is wrong. I insist with all things considered - my anal, perfectionist, over-zealous, borderline paranoid concern for my daughter - that I know something is not right. I am a first time mom, I am not experienced and the bean has never had an ear infection but I know my baby better than anyone else, and dammit, I would rather you prove me wrong and mock me than not check at all and throw my concerns into a pile of things to brush off. I searched and searched convinced I was not imagining this and finally found someone who not only confirmed my instincts, but in that time, my poor kid suffered all because doctors are won over by their experiences and their egos rather than hear out a mother's insistence that experience or none at all, she knows her baby best. Unfortunately, it turned out that my instincts were right so a small infection in one ear, not only spread to both ears but she had to be on much stronger antibiotics which can be quite upsetting to her tiny little stomach when all it would've taken was the proper initial diagnosis and a much gentler antibiotic could have resolved this nearly a week ago. So my inexperienced advice to moms (and dads) if you don't think your doctor is being careful enough or thorough enough and not addressing your concerns, go find someone who will and continue to ask questions because it's better to be the crazy mom who is wrong than the sane mom who does it all per doctor's orders only to realize doctors are wrong too. Not only because they're human, but also because sometimes their i-know-better-than-you-i-went-to-med-school egos won't allow them to admit an error. Proof? My bean's before and after pics.

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