Friday, July 30, 2010

Different, but Better

I go shopping often. I don't mean for diapers, cereal, formula kind of shopping. I mean the fun kind. Where you see those sexy 4 inch heels that would go oh-so-perfectly with that slinky black dress at Nordstrom or those $200 pair of pants from Bloomingdales kind of shopping? Yeah, uhm, no. When I go, I come home with nothing OR my favorite (usually online, but off as well) stores that sell those pretty tops, suits, pants, dresses and shoes have, in fact, been replaced by stores that sell diapers, formula, onesies and the like. Husband generously gave me a budget to go shopping with on one of my most recent mall trips. One to spend on myself. I spent it on an Ergo carrier (don't know what it is? Google it and go buy one if your kid weighs more than 15-pounds. Seriously). I still have the same appreciation for the finer things, yes, but the importance of them are far below my list. Somewhere near having to pick up scrubbing bubbles and tilex for the tub from Target. It's a different life. I spend my days in t-shirts and boxers. On days I feel like dressing up, I shower a little earlier and pull on a pair of jeans with a t-shirt that isn't soggy from baby drool and/or spit up (at least it's clean while I'm putting it on. I didn't say anything about it staying that way). I greedily eye that cute knit sweater in size 6-12 months because she can wear it in cooler weather and it's on sale now. My heart is set on a pair of shoes not meant to be walked in because she does not yet walk. While motherhood does not have to be all encompassing, as you don't have to drown under the title "mommy" and "wife", it is rather easy to lose the "me" in yourself and I do think most Mommies struggle with it. I am now learning that there can be a balance, but you know what? All encompassing or perfectly balanced (for those super moms out there that I most certainly am not) all would probably agree that yes, it is a different life, but better. Much. *Side note: (1) I have never bought pants for $200. I swear! and (2) if you're wondering why there are no photos today, it's because my baby fell off the bed in the middle of the night (no, we don't co-sleep - SHE JUST DID, OKAY!?! *SOB*) and I.am.lazy.because.I.am.tired. Good night.

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